Azcool (azcool) wrote,
Azcool
azcool

The Land of Mundania

Drama! Its everywhere. Then again we are naturally dramatic people so it would only serve that there would be drama but there is a difference from what occurs naturally and what is initiated. I find that those craving attention of who fear that the attention they are currently receiving will initiate a certain level of drama; to regain the attention of the desired person or persons. But is that appropriate and if so when do you stop? How much is too much?
Life seems so mundane. Its the same thing over and over. Never a change, no spontaneity and no challenges. The most exciting my life seems to get anymore is the occasional outing i get and what ever drama i magically get involved in or have the pleasure of being a spectator of. Sometimes it is a genuinely challenging question as to is my prime-time tv more or less entertaining than whats going on at this moment. (thats bad, by the way, or perhaps sad). I've dealt with the loss of a best friend, the reaffirmation of friendships from old ones, falling in love, falling out of love, being loved in return, being used, being lied to, being betrayed, being a supporter, being the bearer of bad news. This year I've been hospitalized twice, nearly lost a good job, have had to many close calls to count, way to many second chances, faith reaffirmed and dashed in the same stroke, hope tested beyond what is normally expected of people, and i have been challenged by almost every person i know. I said this was going to be a difficult year...i had no idea what i was saying until now. More difficult choices lie ahead for me. i struggle to find the strength to face these choices and follow through.
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